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[06 Dec 2009|10:56pm] |
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music |
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ghostface killah |
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blaaaahh. i wanna disappear.
gonna ask to be transferred to floral or front end at work. here's hopin'.
i need a legit job. god.
bye.
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[03 Dec 2009|02:27am] |
"there are two very specific people i want to become friends with"
i have no idea who those people are or what i meant by that. hahah.
and i am really uncontrollably hungry tonight.
sleepy but insist on watching the office via netflix online, which is actually a terrible idea.
i need taco bell. like, now.
today sucked horribly.
done.
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[01 Dec 2009|02:07am] |
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mood |
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gooood! |
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music |
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papapapoker face |
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i had a lot of fun tonight, very thankful to everyone who came out.
i am so sick of food now, hahah. there are 2 very specific people i want to become friends with. st louis + tattoo appointment soon.
so excited about the future.
wish i had someone to go to bed with :(
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[24 Nov 2009|02:28am] |
i just wanna curl up and watch a sopranos marathon right now! i wish i owned the box set. tomorrow i am going to rent grumpy old men. that movie is right up my alley. watched the goods tonight...sooo good! maybe thats just because i was blazed.
speaking of, no more smoking those trees for me. i'm going to try not to at least..which probably wont be that hard for me to overcome.
i think i have a keloid...oh no!
i'm drained. blah.
i still think about him everyday. sometimes it absolutely scares me to death to know he probably wont be in my life ever again. i'm so sorry.
positive note, thanksgiving=food and wine with my favorite people, my family.
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[20 Nov 2009|12:17pm] |
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pursuit of happiness by kid cudi has been on constant repeat for the last 3 days. i feel like it's my theme song right now. i have an epicly (is that a word) long to-do list today. i was planning on getting up earlier but it's noon, oops. my family gets here for thanksgiving in 4 days. i'm so excited! november has passed so ridiculously fast it seems. i would like to skip over december and go straight to january.
it's nice having people pay for me once in awhile. weird, but nice.
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[17 Nov 2009|02:45am] |
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mood |
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zzzz |
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music |
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alpha & omega |
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it's cold. freezing. raining and occasionally snowing. i only work 25 hours this week. i am so so excited. plan on sleeping til 1 tomorrow and maybe driving to lawrence, or just run errands around topeka. depends on the weather.
i've been watching a lot of w.c. fields movies lately, thank you netflix.
i told myself last year i wouldn't see another kansas winter. psh. looks like i'll be here for awhile.
still freaking out about my birthday. i've cancelled kelseys plans to throw me a dinner. is it possible to have a quarter-life crisis?
this band is so good.
the end.
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[13 Nov 2009|11:54pm] |
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hm,
i turn 20 in two weeks. i'm freaking out.
first friday night home in a long time. i like it a lot.
2nd bomb threat at work in 48 hours. this rules.
hopefully next time the bomber wont warn us and just blow the motherfucker up. i wanna go out big.
just spent way too much money on myself.
read today the average woman owns 19 beauty products including tools.
i own 19 tools alone. this is sad.
i am growing up and i can feel it, but i kind of like it.
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[04 Nov 2009|09:05pm] |
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i think bob dylan's voice is one of the most soothing things i've ever heard.
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[01 Nov 2009|11:52pm] |
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didnt have time to exercise for a couple days and gained 5 pounds. what the fuck.
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[27 Oct 2009|12:27am] |
i haven't cried in a while but i'm holding back the tears now.
decent night, til i get a ex-text saying something rude. not just rude..because that i can handle. he's always rude. but it was just really hurtful. i'm so angry, i just want to pound someone face in.
no one is awake to talk to about it.
i'm alone. not only now, but if i really think about it i'm always alone. i've always been alone and i'll always be alone. i don't think i'm meant for human connection and interaction. i dont think i'm meant for friends and lovers. its so painful to go through life like i have my whole life. i dont remember ever being a child, innocence, laughter, friendship. just anger, hurt, noise..nothing was peaceful. now it's almost too peaceful. most days are filled with silence. even at work, still silence.
i really don't wanna be here anymore. i'm not suicidal. i just want to disappear. vanish into thin air. i really don't see a point in anything anymore.
hi, hibernation mode. let's see if anyone will notice.
12 pack with my name all over it in my trunk. bout to kill it.
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| lazy day |
[25 Oct 2009|06:05pm] |
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music |
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circle takes the square |
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stoned and eating a peanut butter, nutella, pretzel, and banana sandwich.
thumbs up.
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[23 Oct 2009|04:55pm] |
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music |
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yeah yeah yeahs |
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why yes, i do have the hots for george lopez.
edit: good lawd his talk show is bad.
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[20 Oct 2009|11:50pm] |
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i need to give my brain a workout.
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[15 Oct 2009|10:10pm] |
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alright alright. i hate laptops. i hate technology. what the fuuuuuuck.
i need a smart, possibly geeky man in my life to guide me through all this technological mumbo-jumbo.
i have lost 9 pounds so far and im so psyched. my clothes fit better already. my goal is 125, so about 15 more pounds to lose. yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
also im destashing my makeup collection, as well as every other possesion in my life. i am kinda high maintenance and i want to minimalize my life as much as possible. it's totally freeing to not have tons of stuff!
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[15 Oct 2009|04:45am] |
i would like nothing more than to collect my money from you and get you out of my life forever.
hate you.
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[11 Oct 2009|12:22pm] |
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mood |
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miffed. |
] |
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music |
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jay reatard |
] |
i think i might start writing in this again. just as an outlet. so here goes.
fuck my job.
fuck my job.
fuck my job(s).
dillons is such a bastard. and the bar is wearing me out. as soon as i get home tonight i am applying to ku. i can't handle this too much longer, and i'm so ready for college.
my goal is $5000. it's official that i'm not spending anymore more money, except on gas. for some reason i feel like writing this down makes it more official.
worknowbecausetheychangedthescheduleonme. awesome.
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| attn; everyone |
[15 Aug 2005|10:45am] |
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mood |
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x-hausted |
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music |
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wolfbrigade |
] |
tonight
my house
5:30 or 6 ish
come if you enjoy blood, guts, and whiskey
213-4708
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| couldd i fuck stuff up a little more for myself |
[25 Jul 2005|11:18pm] |
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pretty crazy night.
yeah i'm a litle crushed.ok im alot crushed. iw ish it wouldve worked.
thanks to everyone who helped me out.
i guess things are good with troy and i now. that was the good point of the night. those kids are all funny. couldve been a great night.
the bad was obvious.
damn.
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[27 Jun 2005|04:02pm] |
fucking goddamnit. shit sucks.
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| when will it get hot? |
[01 Jun 2005|03:37pm] |
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mood |
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cold..though it isn't a mood |
] |
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music |
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the anniversary |
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i guess you all are craving an update. weeeell, summer hasn't been all i was hoping for. yet. too many people are on vacations. hoping i get to go to arizona where all the hottees are. i wish my girls were all here.
things have been akward.
umm...sweet show thursday..and sunday? i keep having crazy dreams about the new house. i suppose i've been watching too many murder/ghost shows on history/travel/cbs/a&e/lifetime. yay unsolved mysteries. yay robert stack.
i love golfing, even though james will beat me horribly. i started tennis. they are tricky. i am quitting.
i met the love of my life sunday. i am calling him once i learn how to speak spanish.
the gray in my hair is turning like mousy-brown. nasssty.
let's go camping. anyone?
i could spend all my money at dollar stores. all 9 dollars of it.
this entry put bob robs to sleep
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